Sung to the tune of the Soviet National Anthem:
(Ned Kelly’s note): I received this video clip in an email from our old friend Ivan. Here is his email to me, and he has given me permission to post it here.
Dear Ned,
I want to apologize to you and to all China blogosphere readers for every time I have ever used the phrase, “Communist Pigs”. When I saw this music video (see above) of Chairman Obama’s anthem, it reminded me of everything I have ever admired in Soviet Russia – especially the really cool Stalinist music, and the cheap vodka.
If this is a sign of what Obama’s America will be like – cool music and lots of cheap vodka – then I say, bring it on!
It’s all so clear to me now. Obviously Obama’s campaign for “change” and “hope” has been inspired by lots of cheap vodka, and Obama’s kind of socialism will be the benevolent kind, just like Soviet Russia’s – and by “benevolent” I mean giving the people lots of cheap vodka. As I’ve told you before, the Soviet KGB used to call vodka the “liquid policeman”, because it prevented the people from thinking too clearly or questioning the benevolence of their Soviet Paradise.
And cheap vodka inspires the kind of “hope” that requires no realistic context. Also, it inspires maudlin belief in substitute kinds of spirituality, and sentimental reverence for remote, indifferent leaders with whom the people have no personal connection – but if you drink a bottle of vodka every day, you can imagine that your distant, impersonal, socialist leaders really care.
(Two hour pause….okay now I’m back.)
Right. So niw that I drnk half a bottle of vokgda I wanna tell ya somnthing. And you better listn. I am sorry to be white and sorry too for being Americn, Obama will change that, Obaama will change me and America and our too whiteness. I a,m thanksful to Obama because he teaches me and us too white coutnry, it;s time for us to learn from a black I mean African-American like Neslon Mandelo was african-American too. Obama will take my guilt away like Jesus but better than jesus because Jesus was a white imperialist like all Christians.
And I feel guiulty for another reason, I never told my father I love him, Chairman Obama reminds me of my father who was white but that was not his fault, and Obama will take the whitness away. (Sniff, sob)…Dad, I’m sorry! I love you Dad! And I love my three stepdads too, especially my gay stepdad and his two ex-husbands! I need a father figure and so does America, and we all need an African father who will take our guilt away. (More sobbing…)….DAD! ALRIGHT I ADMIT IT! I HATE you, Dad, because you were never there for me! But Obama will be there for us, like our fathers never were….
Note from Ned Kelly: Our friend Ivan, who has a wild imagination, neglected to insert a few hundred “sarcasm” emoticons into that email.
